Peace is not generally the first feeling you think of when thinking about divorce. But the disagreements and conflict that got you to where you are today do not have to dictate how you travel to tomorrow. We know that even though your marriage might be ending, your family isn’t. Finding peace in your divorce process is the surest way to ensure long-term peace for you and your … [Read more...] about Is a Peaceful Divorce Possible?
The decision to end a marriage is rarely, if ever, an easy one. When the decision is finally made, it often feels like the only option is to permanently cut all ties with your ex-spouse. And although this might be an option for couples without children, it often is not possible for couples with minor or adult children. The simple fact is, dissolving the marriage does not dissolve … [Read more...] about Why Is a Post-Divorce Relationship Necessary?
The holidays can be difficult, even in the best of times. Co-parenting can be particularly trying. Conflicts commonly arise related to when and how the children will spend their holiday time. In ordinary times, a good parenting plan is designed to mitigate these conflicts. However, a good parenting plan likely has not anticipated parenting during a pandemic such as COVID-19. … [Read more...] about How to Manage a Divorce, The Holidays and COVID-19
Parents who divorce face the reality that two homes will be trying to meet budgets on the same income that once supported just one. The children will go back and forth between these two homes spending significant time in each home. Best outcomes for the children dictate they should feel comfortable at each home and believe that mom’s house is their house and that dad’s house is their house. It is … [Read more...] about How Does Child Support Work?
Child Custody and visitation are determined based upon the best interests of the children. These determinations may be made by agreement of the parents or after hearing upon the findings and orders of a court. Courts are supportive and very encouraging for parents to make these determinations by agreement. Courts know parents know their children better than anyone and can agree to custody and … [Read more...] about How To Determine Child Custody and Visitation
Visiting with my father-in-law recently, our conversation turned to a recollection from my litigation past. Time and resources are always at a premium in the courtroom, and judges can lose patience with litigants whom they perceive as unreasonable or wasting the court’s time. This couple on this day, 12 – 15 years ago, rang that bell. They were standing in front of the court using their time to … [Read more...] about What Does It Mean to Be A Family Peacemaker?
Most of the emotions that we see during the course of the breakdown of a marriage and the divorce process boil down to fear. I do not say that from my own expertise but from what I have heard over and over again from my colleagues in the mental health profession. The first victim of any marriage that is failing is communications. As communications break down, people can no longer successfully … [Read more...] about Dealing with the Fear in a Divorce
I’m kind of a language nerd. You know the type, likes crossword puzzles and the arcane. For instance, the other night I was a guest presenter at a divorce recovery workshop at a local church. I love guesting for this divorce ministry because once upon a time I needed and benefited tremendously from this ministry [different church, same ministry] so it’s kind of like roots. … [Read more...] about Some words bring laughter, joy and healing; others – grief